Tight Head, Loose Balls

This is a tongue in gumshield view of English rugby. It will first of all uphold the ethos, camaraderie and dodgy morality of the greatest team game in the world. However, it will be biased and if you aren't English, don't expect me to apologise either. Once I get the hang of it, I will encourage comments and forums, but all those Wind Up Merchants (one-eyed Taffs and Kiwis please note) that clog up other boards will find themselves on the end of a good shoeing and rucked out the back.

Thursday, 18 October 2007

Frogs legless - Argies miserable

This was the moment when England finally smothered the French resistance. Worzle tap tackling Vincent Clerc to snuff out what looked like the winning score.

After that, it was all England for the last 5 minutes with Jonny calmly slotting a penalty and a crucial drop goal to edge in front by 5 points.

The drop was crucial because it meant we could defend without the fear of giving away a penalty, but the Frogs were clueless in attack and the game was ours!

Brilliant stuff. Did you see Le gyppo crying? Marvellous.

In the other semi, the Argies managed to play all the rugby in the first half and yet cough up 3 tries to the Boks. Maybe they were knackered after 5 weeks of knockout rugby, yet even the best Argy players looked second rate. Shame, as this South African team is not as great as their big headed fans would have us believe.

Still, its game on for the final. I am off to France too, sadly not to Paris, but to the Riviera - crappy timing on my part. For which I will have to endure the French TV commentary, or turn the sound down and put the radio on. Either way you can't miss it.

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Things we like

We admire the dedication, fitness and professionalism of today's top players. But we also want them to remember they are rugby players and have a beer or two and let their hair down every now and again.
Vigorous rucking - with a good bit of shoe for those who stray on the wrong side or attempt to kill the ball
The British Lions - the greatest tour and probably the only professional one
Singing Mucky songs - yes I know its a cliche but anything which makes you thirsty must be a good idea
Proper Scrums and Lineouts - nothing against rugby league but we prefer our restarts to be contested and our forwards to be different shapes and sizes
Happy Hour
Easter Tours - long may they continue

Things we don't like

We abhor the blazers and marketing idiots at the RFU and wish to ask them just in whose best interests are they screwing up the game.
The new throat slitting haka. If its a tradition, why change it?
The IB and the cretins behind the new ELVs. Legalising bringing down a maul?!! Please forward all law suits c/o Paddy O'Brian, Dublin
Lady singers for the anthems - unless they wear a low cut top and are showing off their Charlies - thank you Katherine Jenkins
Interfering touch judges who would rather be refereeing the game - are you watching Stuart Dickinson, Steve Walsh and horror of horrors, Jim Fleming
Hotel Owners/Managers who can't distinguish between good old fashioned high jinks on tour and vandalism (see also foreign police and souvenir collecting)